Summer Dreaming

“We are music makers, and we are dreamers of dreams.”

–Roald Dahl

            A few weeks ago, with the shifting of the weather and my sights set on the faint glimmer of summer’s arrival, I felt something stir deep in my soul. Each time I sat down to chip away at my to-do list, my mind wandered. It started slowly at first, but what began as a few simple daydreams soon turned into something I couldn’t stop thinking about.  My mind wandered to warm nights on porches, fireflies over fields, and hammocks strung between trees. It seemed like every time I allowed it to, my mind wanted to dream.  So I let it.  This weekend I finally sat down & channeled the dreams into something tangible. It came onto paper in the form of a bucket list. While I was once worried about my first summer in Nashville, I am excited for the prospect of a southern summer in a city I am quickly growing to love. The list is a work in progress. There are items that are failed attempts at past bucket lists which embody desires I’ve had for years, items that are iconic Nashville “must-do” events, and some that are just fun lines from sentimental country songs, that if I am completely honest, I really hope get crossed off.  Here are a few highlights:

One: Join the East Nasty Running Club: 

            I haven’t really mentioned it before, but on April 27^th I am running the St. Jude Music City Half Marathon. Throughout this semester, I have enjoyed training for this race with some of my favorite friends who also happen to be classmates. I am fascinated by the fact that I can (fairly) painlessly get my body to run 13.1 miles. Once the race is over, I want to continue what I’ve started, & the The East Nasty Running Club seems like the perfect way to do this. For my Fort Collins friends, East Nashville reminds me SO much of The Fort. Running through it is good for my heart in more than one way.

Two: Become a share holder with a local farm:

            I’ve had a long-standing vision of being a backyard chicken and vegetable farmer. Maybe it’s been instilled in my small town, Colorado soul, but I dream about walking into my back yard to collect eggs and fresh veggies each morning. The problem with now is I live in an apartment, in the city, & while I did entertain the thought of it here for a brief minute or so, doing this myself just isn’t going to fly. The good news is, I can reap the benefits of local farming, without doing it myself through community shared agriculture. Think what you might about the type of person who participates in a CSA, [& you’re probably correct] but this stuff is cool.

Here are the ones I’m checking out: Green Door Gourmet & Real Food Farms

Three: Watch the sunrise from Café Coco’s porch:

            It’s officially patio-sitting weather here in Nashville.  This place is open 24 hours & I have fallen in love with the people-watching, the vanilla Italian cream sodas, and strangely enough, the frequently failing internet that forces me to stop working for a bit to chat with my neighbors. I am excited for the conversations to be had on this porch.

Here’s to dreaming. 

-Laura

Thursday Thankfulness [April]

This evening I sat outside & listened to the rain. 

I shivered a little bit, but I was captivated by the unsteady beat of the raindrops

on the plastic awning that was keeping me dry. 

24 hours before, I sat at the same coffee shop, in

a T-shirt, finishing a good book in good company. 

On both nights, I found myself thankful.

[Thankfulness today:]
1. Rain
2. Good books
3. Home stretch of school
4. 80 degree sunshine
5. Weekly goals & conviction
6. Finishing fieldwork
7. Learning surrender
8. 1 year of growth [more on this soon]
9. 10-mile runs that don't kill me
10. Bible study

[Those] girls.

          I used to think it was kind of crazy when girls did things regarding their future husbands. I had a roommate once who kept a journal that she wrote letters in- each of them addressed to the man she would one day marry. For whatever reason, the idea of that journal freaked me out a little. I had another friend who frequently wrote, altered, and perfected “the list.” The list was made of details, down to eye and hair color, that described her perfect future husband. She fully believed that this list would manifest her perfect man, & if she searched long enough, she would find him. It is not as puzzling to me why that list freaked me out more than a little bit.  Sure, I’ve prayed for him when I’ve thought about it, on occasion. But most of the time I’ve just rolled my eyes & allowed these activities to be left to the crazy girls; the ones so desperate to discover who they’ll end up with that the quest itself leaves them bitter & jaded by any male relationship that does not fulfill the heavy expectations in their hopeful hearts. I’m not saying this cynical view is correct, but it’s what I’ve generally believed.

         Maybe it’s because it’s spring & the save-the-dates on our fridge are multiplying each time I blink, but lately I’ve found my thoughts wandering to who my future husband is- who he will be. I’m not writing any journals or keeping any lists of characteristics, but I do sometimes find myself musing over what that future might look like. Like just about everything else I am cynical toward & then change my mind about, I tell myself, “It’s different when I do it.”  It’s less desperate or weird when I do it, because my motives are pure, I’m just being forward thinking, etc.  For the record, I’m certainly not becoming one of those girls. [If I were to hashtag this statement, it would look something like this: #denial] So maybe I am becoming one of those girls. But either way, It’s kind of fun to wonder who he’ll be. I mostly wonder about harmless things. Things like:

I wonder if he was on Jack Shepard’s side or John Locke’s side [because he must be on one]

I wonder what his dreams & passions are.

I wonder if he’s contemplated what his patronus would be if Hogwarts were real.

I wonder if he ever wrote a journal to me or if he ever made “the list.”

I wonder if he already possesses a love for Arrested Development, or if he’s willing to be converted.

            The nature of these things I am wondering might be an indication in itself that I am

A. Not ready to married

B. Actually more crazy than "those" girls,

but it is fun to think of these things.  At the very least, it helps me realize a hopeful, non-bitter side to the future of relationships. 

Changing seasons

Despite my lack of blogging about it, I am

indeed still trying to keep up with being intentionally thankful. 

It's been good for me. I've realized that as the seasons change, 

I am surprised to be confronted by things that 

I thought might be left in the past. Matters of the heart are tricky 

like that. Sometimes I think they're gone, but if I stand still 

long enough, they catch up to me. But I'm learning to allow them to catch me, 

as opposed to staying busy just for the sake of not allowing any of them 

the chance to look me in the eye.

& when I look at them head on, they don't seem so big anymore.

I am thankful that the changing of the seasons allows this perspective change. 

Discovering Nashville: The Well

Now that I'm starting to feel like I know Nashville a bit 

[& I no longer take 45-minute-long detours of the city because I'm lost]

I decided I'd start documenting some of the places I've stumbled upon.

Since I'm working on homework most of the time, I've spent lots of 

quality time in the many coffee shops that exist here, & I've found my favorite: 

The Well 

There's someting about this place that is very Every Day Joe's-esque.

[Which I miss terribly]

It's in a renovated old drive-through fast food restauraunt & everything

about it screams Nashville, from the burlap coffee sack covered chairs to the 

small stage for impromtu open-mic nights and Tuesday night church services. 

The main room is divided from the bar by two blue barn doors. 

The Well is the kind of coffee shop that makes me take out my headphones,

& listen, because their music is so good. There are books for sale & fair trade items,

& the profits of their coffee go to help underpriveledged people all over the world. 

They have a "wishing well" where people can post prayer requests,

encouragements, or needs, & anyone can take them to help get the 

poster's needs met. It's a beautiful picture of community. 

Be sure to check out their website. It's sweet. 

ps. Tomorrow begins 30 days of thanks-giving. I'm excited. 

Now.

I've been thinking a lot about how cool it is to be in a season of life

where I have very little holding me down. Sometimes I think about 

how just 3 months ago, I was living in Colorado, about to move

1,200 miles away. Now I'm here & it's great & all I can think about is where 

I'll be for my residency, because there are so many places I want to visit.

[spoiler alert: it's Austin, TX. More on that later.]

But in the midst of my excitement for the future, I've realized that 

I am often robbed of each day's joy because of my anticipation of what's next.

So this is now: 

I am almost done with my first semester of graduate school.

I've found friends & a church that I love.

I live in a beautiful city, in a huge apartment, in a cute room.

I have the best roommates I could ask for.

It's almost November, and I still get to run outside in a tank top.

I am so very thankful for it all. 

Introducing: Tennessee

I've made my decision.

In just 4 months I will be leaving Colorado, 

the place I was born & spent most of my life,

for Tennessee.

[I'll trade mountains 

for rolling hills,

snow

for rain & greenery

and breweries galore

for sweet tea. ]

Nashville.

Today did not go as I planned. I certainly would never have planned to spend 12 hours of my day writing two papers, one of which I already wrote [&lost somewhere in the depths of a campus computer] In fact, I don't think anyone would have planned that kind of day. But nevertheless, that's how I spent it. I spent the first half of the day upset and flustered, on the edge of tears that I had to rush to get my work done [after vowing to not procrastinate in my last semester] but the second half of the day I found myself happy joyful. I'm thankful that I can be changed.

In other news, here's a quick update on the past couple days and my trip to Nashville:
[I never saw Taylor Swift, but I did see her apartment.]

At 11 PM local time, Mickey and I landed in Nashville, 

much to our surprise, in a very tiny airport.

We were greeted with pictures of country music stars [everywhere] 

and started to feel less and less trendy by the minute. [Those Nash-villains have style.]

The weekend was a whirlwind of campus tours, meeting with faculty at Belmont, 

Navigating the city with Mickey's lovely friends, Bru, KB, and Steve, 

and spending some time getting to see what the locals do. 

Mickey and I both were really surprised and somewhat comforted

 to see how small the city actually is, and both of us were impressed by the

hospitality of the people as well as the opportunities that Nashville offered.

It was a wonderful weekend and I hope to return in January for an interview. 

[the skeletal system picture is a print I found at a boutique. So cool.]