Learning.

I'm finally back in Colorado.

I wish I could say I'm excited to be back, 

but the idea of returning to Fort Collins as a graduate

terrifies me. [&the transition from shorts weather in TX

to frigid cold doesn't help either.] 

This "winter break" that I just experienced 

was much different than expected. 

In many ways it was 

longer

harder

more painful

& more confusing than I envisioned it. 

My apologies for being so vague, but 

if there's one thing I learned in the 

past year, it's the damaging

effects that can result of verbalizing

emotionally-based statements

before they have properly been processed or solidified. 

I so often nurse fleeting thoughts as 

substantial ones. 

So in an effort to not do this, I am going to

relax for once. I'm going to find peace

in the face of uncertainty, fear, and the possibility

of experiencing some major changes in my life. 

I'm going to practice being responsive rather than reactive.